The Real Reason Women Say No to Sex — and It's Not What You Think
Feeling physically prepared plays a larger role in intimacy than many might assume. According to new findings, many women choose to forgo sex not due to lack of desire, but because they don’t feel adequately groomed—especially when it comes to body hair.
A new study shows women often say no to sex due to grooming concerns. It's not about desire—it’s about feeling confident in the moment.
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Health tech company Philips recently conducted a survey involving 2,000 women and found that nearly one-third avoid intimacy if they haven’t shaved their legs. The data highlights a key insight: for many women, physical readiness plays a significant role in sexual desire and confidence.
Personal hygiene also heavily factors into these decisions. More than 50% of respondents said they would refuse sex if they hadn’t showered. Brushing teeth ranked high on the list as well, with 48% of women citing unbrushed teeth as a dealbreaker for getting intimate. Additionally, about 30% admitted to skipping sex if their underarms weren’t shaved.
The underlying theme is one of vulnerability and self-assurance. An overwhelming 90% of women reported that being well-groomed enhances their sense of sexual confidence. Feeling clean and polished contributes to a more comfortable, empowered experience in the bedroom.
A representative for Philips noted that, although individual preferences vary, looking and feeling one's best remains a significant part of the intimate experience. The psychology of intimacy, they said, often begins with personal self-care rituals that promote comfort and confidence.
On the flip side of the spectrum, not all women are dialing it down in the bedroom. Another study published in Personality and Individual Differences revealed that some individuals are having sex up to 20 times per week. Conducted by researchers at the Australian National University, the study grouped people into four categories of sexual activity: mild, moderate, intense, and libidinous.
Participants classified as “mild” reported an average of just 2.5 sexual encounters per week, while the “libidinous” group topped out at 20 sessions weekly. Lead researcher Adam Bode emphasized that sexual preferences and activity levels differ vastly from person to person—there is no one-size-fits-all approach to intimacy.
This evolving body of research suggests that sexual behavior is not only influenced by desire or attraction, but also by individual rituals and psychological readiness—especially among women, where grooming and hygiene are key confidence factors.
